I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
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