I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
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