That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
Randomize