I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
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