What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
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