we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
Randomize