Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
In America we eat man semen.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Randomize