i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
