You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
well you can't waste a boner
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
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I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
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He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
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