i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Randomize
