So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
Randomize
