So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Randomize
