Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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