my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Did I show you my penis last night?
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
