If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
can't come. weird drunk guy passed out on couch. long story, tell u later.
wtf. wake him up, call him a cab, get over here!
i just want to make sure he doesn't die. or rob me. plus it's facinating, he's faceplant on the arm of my sofa.
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
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