the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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