So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
Randomize