We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize