Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
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