i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
I spilled a beer on myself, so I went back to my place to change. The city marshall was at my door with a warrant. That beer cost me 760 bucks.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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