You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
Girls should come with a carfax report
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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