he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Randomize
