jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
the liver wants what the liver wants
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize