he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
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