Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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