that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
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