this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
You might have been able to redeem yourself had you not referred to grandma as "this bitch".
That explains the hand print on my face. That old lady knows how to throw a punch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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