you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
