why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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