just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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