Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
im as drunk as the barefoot contessa. GET TO MY LEVEL
dude. stop pregaming the food network.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Randomize
