I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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