It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
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