So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Randomize
