Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
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