I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
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