guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize