Hey man sorry I got all grabby
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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