She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Randomize
