I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
I drank a fishbowl of liquor and next thing I know I'm sliding into Zach Galifinakis' DMs
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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