More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
Randomize
