I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
Randomize