...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
