after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
