There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
