You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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