there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Randomize