Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Randomize
