I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
