sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
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