so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Randomize
